Wedding Wishing Well Guide - Wording, Etiquette and Going Digital (Australia, 2026)

A wishing well is a common Australian and New Zealand term for the cash-gift box at a wedding: a decorated box, barrel or birdcage beside the guest book, and now often a link or QR code online. The etiquette is short. Put the request on your wedding website or an insert card, not the invitation. Say what you're saving for, and word it so the ask stays optional.

Money and rules meet below, so read this as general information, not legal or tax advice. Etiquette, amounts and tax treatment vary by household and by country — check your own situation with a professional.

What a wishing well is

Australian wedding site Easy Weddings describes the modern version plainly: these days, couples "opt for a cash or digital wishing well" over traditional gift registries (Easy Weddings). US platforms call the same idea a cash registry or honeymoon fund.

On the day versus online

Many couples run both. A wishing well sign earns its place too: a small framed card naming the well, noting gifts are optional, with the QR code.

Before you point guests abroad at a link: money across borders costs more. PayPal's Australian merchant fees page lists 2.90% plus a fixed A$0.30 for receiving domestic commercial transactions, and an extra 1.00% on international ones (PayPal Australia, checked 16 September 2026). Those rates are for payments received as commercial transactions. They come out of your net, not your guest's pocket.

Wishing well wording: 10 examples to adapt

Use these as a starting point. Your own names and savings goal stop a line reading like a template.

Short and simple

1. "We're lucky to have everything we need at home. If you'd like to give a gift, our wishing well is on our website."
2. "Your presence is the present. If you'd still like to give something, our wishing well would be warmly received."

Warm and personal

3. "After three house moves our cupboards are full and our suitcases are empty. A wishing well gift fixes the second problem."

Funny

4. "We already own two of everything, opinions included. A wishing well gift saves you from buying us a third salad bowl."

Honeymoon wishing well

5. "Instead of a gift list we've set up a honeymoon wishing well: snorkelling, long dinners, and one unnecessary boat trip."

Saving for a home

6. "We're saving for a deposit on our first place. A wishing well gift becomes a floorboard, and we'll tell you which one."

Rhyming verse

7. "A gift is never asked of you, / your presence on the day will do. / But if you'd like to wish us well, / there's a link beside the wishing well."

Engagement party

8. "We're not expecting gifts tonight. If you'd like to give, our wishing well is helping us save for the wedding."

Baby shower

9. "Nappies, wipes and unsolicited advice are all welcome. There's also a wishing well if you'd rather put something towards the pram."

Milestone birthday

10. "Sixty years and quite enough vases, thank you. If you'd like to mark the day, the wishing well is going towards a trip."

More lines for invitations, websites and signs: honeymoon fund wording.

Wishing well etiquette, hedged honestly

How much do guests usually put in? Easy Weddings, an Australian wedding publisher, polled 320 nearlyweds. It reports that "on average, guests contribute anywhere from $50 to $200", and that 44% of couples would expect $100–$150 per couple. The page doesn't say when the poll ran (Easy Weddings). That's one publisher's survey, not a going rate. More in how much to give for a wedding gift.

Do you put a card in the wishing well? Usually, yes. At Australian receptions the well is a card box, holding cards with cash or a cheque inside. If you gave online already, a card with just a note is perfectly ordinary.

Do you put your name on it? Signing is the practical choice. Without a name, the couple generally can't thank you.

Is it rude to ask? Opinion divides, and one publisher's poll is what we can point at: Easy Weddings reports that almost 89% of the nearlyweds it surveyed said they would be requesting cash gifts, and 78% "felt completely comfortable asking for cold hard cash" (Easy Weddings). Framing does the work: keep the ask off the invitation, say what it's for, and make clear that coming is enough. See asking for money instead of wedding gifts.

And guests who can't come? This is where a digital well earns its keep. Interstate relatives and anyone who declines can give from where they are.

Is a wishing well gift counted as income in Australia?

Generally not, going by the ATO's guidance on gifts, though that guidance doesn't mention weddings. The ATO's guidance on amounts you don't include as income says you generally don't declare "rewards or gifts on special occasions, such as cash birthday presents and gifts from relatives given out of love". It adds that gifts "may be taxable if you receive them as part of a business-like activity or for your income-earning activities as an employee or contractor" (Australian Taxation Office, archived 3 September 2026). The ATO page doesn't name wedding gifts; its examples are birthday cash and gifts from relatives given out of love. Your own circumstances differ, though — ask a registered tax agent. Rules also differ outside Australia.

Sources

• Easy Weddings (Australia) — Wedding wishing wells 101 (definition of a cash or digital wishing well; poll of 320 nearlyweds; $50–$200 average contribution; 44% expecting $100–$150 per couple; 89% requesting cash gifts; 78% comfortable asking)
• PayPal Australia — merchant fees (2.90% + A$0.30 standard rate for receiving domestic commercial transactions; additional 1.00% for international commercial transactions)
• Australian Taxation Office — Amounts you do not include as income, archived copy of 3 September 2026 (gifts on special occasions generally not declared; the business-activity and income-earning caveat). The live ato.gov.au page blocks automated retrieval, so the archived snapshot is linked

General information only — not legal or tax advice. Rules vary by country and change; verify and consult a professional.